34

Scholar Wenren Shows His Prowess at Cuifu Nunnery

The Nun Jingguan Goes in Glory to Huangsha Lane

As the poem says,

Wine does not intoxicate;

Men themselves fall ready prey.

Beauty does not infatuate;

Men themselves are willing captives.

Improper thoughts that arise

from what is not decreed by fate

Should be driven from the mind

by the sword of wisdom.

Our story makes the point that marriages are predestined. There is no shortage of cases in which whole treasuries are drained and shrewd brains are racked to bring about marriages, but all to no avail. There are also impoverished men with meagerly furnished rooms who, when their fates so dictate, may find themselves betrothed, all too unexpectedly, to women who are total strangers and far out of their league, to say nothing of women whom they meet and converse with through matchmakers. Sima Xiangru is a case in point.1 As the ancients said, “All marriages are predestined at the immortals’ Peach Banquet.” Clearly, this is no small matter. Consider these cases from the dawn of time: Kunlun Nu, the Yellow-Robed Sojourner, Captain Xu, and other mighty heroes whose deeds moved heaven and earth and whose eternal fame stems from their accomplishments in bringing about matrimonial alliances in treacherous circumstances.2 And yet, the average man covets every beautiful woman he sees and initiates clandestine affairs until, at the height of his passion, he fantasizes about a permanent union with the woman. To that end, he cudgels his brain and comes up with all manner of devious ways of taking advantage of her, needlessly tarnishing her reputation. When scandals break out, nine out of ten such men die in disgrace without even proper burial places.

Storyteller! If things are as you say, why is it that in this world of ours there are also cases in which adulterers manage to become lawfully wedded couples and sexual predators go unpunished by the law? What makes you say that they all die in disgrace?

Gentle audience, please listen: You may not know the saying “Every intake of food and drink is predestined.” I need say nothing of the bond between husband and wife, but even a casual sexual encounter is also determined by fate. If a clandestine love affair leads to marriage, it is because the lovers happen to have a predestined marriage bond. As for why some sexual predators go unpunished, it is because they turn over a new leaf once their predestined debts are paid. These cases differ from those in which the infatuated rush headlong to their own destruction. I now propose to tell a story about a man who passed as a woman and died as a result of his carnal sin and deception.

In the prefectural seat of Suzhou, there was a grand mansion, to one side of which stood a nunnery named the Beneficence Temple, built by the rich and powerful owner of the mansion. In the nunnery, there were five young nuns, one of whom, by the surname Wang, was a flirtatious beauty. About twenty years of age, she had come to this establishment as a mendicant nun. Although she was the youngest of the nuns, the owner of the mansion made her the abbess because of her excellence in the following three aspects: First, she was a smooth talker, able to discourse on a wide variety of topics. Moving freely in high society, she sweet-talked all the ladies into becoming friends with her. Second, being attuned to people’s feelings, she exhibited a sweet disposition and was always ready to offer help as the occasion demanded. Third, she had a pair of clever hands, able to write, paint, and do embroidery. Ladies from prominent families invited her home to give them lessons or went to the nunnery to seek instruction from her. Every so often, there were also women who came to pray for sons or hold prayer services to ward off evil spirits. Abbess Wang also paid visits to wealthy families and village women, to lure them to the nunnery. As the nunnery had seventeen clean, nicely furnished bedrooms—all supplied with beds, mattresses, quilts, and pillows—the abbess could easily keep visitors overnight. And so not a day went by without one or more female visitors sleeping at the nunnery. Some stayed for only one night, some for longer. There were also women who refused to come again after one visit. No man dared make an appearance at the nunnery because the owner of the adjacent mansion had put up a poster prohibiting the admission of tourists and all other unauthorized persons. Even when women of that family were inside the nunnery, their men dared not intrude, in order to hold themselves above suspicion of wrongdoing, so the abbess was able to receive more and more female visitors. (MC: A hint that something may be amiss.)

To dispense with idle chatter, let me tell of a Director Yuan of the Changzhou Judicial Bureau. At the time our story unfolds, he was in Suzhou, accompanying a censor on an inspection tour of Suzhou prefecture. He found it inconvenient that the inspection office was too close to the office of the censorate. Moreover, the weather was hot, and Director Yuan needed a spacious place to stay, so the county yamen rented a room in the mansion for him.

One late afternoon, Director Yuan was strolling in the courtyard when he noticed a small but tall building. He walked up the stairs in order to take a look around but found a thick layer of dust and sprawling cobwebs. No one had climbed up to this place for a very long time. As a nice breeze swept through, Director Yuan stopped in his tracks to enjoy the cool air. While he stood there, unaware of the passing of time, his eyes came to rest on another small structure across the street. In that two-story structure, several teenage girls were making merry with a pretty nun. The director dodged out of their line of sight. As he stole a glance at them through the window, he saw the nun and the girls embrace one another, or rest their arms on one another’s shoulders and press their cheeks together, or kiss one another on the lips. After watching them for a considerable while, Director Yuan shook his head and said, “How very strange! How can a nun engage in such behavior? Something is wrong here.” He made a mental note of what he had witnessed.

The next day, he called an attendant to him and said, “There’s a temple to the left of this residence. What is it called?”

The attendant replied, “It’s called ‘the Beneficence Temple.’ It belongs to Squire So-and-So.”

“Is it a temple for monks or nuns?”

“There are only five nuns in it.”

“Are there worshippers and monks going in and out?”

“With the owner standing up for the nuns, no man dares enter it without a good reason, let alone monks. Only women from rich families come to visit, and on a daily basis, too.”

The director did not feel reassured. It so happened that the county magistrate arrived to see him at this point. After Director Yuan acquainted the magistrate with what he had observed last evening, the latter ordered the police to carry the director to the nunnery by sedan-chair. After the police tightly surrounded the grounds, the director stepped in. As the nuns rushed out to greet him, he saw that there were only four of them. The one he had seen the day before was not there.

“I understand that there are five nuns in this nunnery,” said he. “Why is one missing?”

The four nuns replied in chorus, “Our abbess is not in.”

“There’s a two-story house on the grounds,” continued the director. “How do you access it?”

The nuns replied evasively, “There are just a few single-story houses on the grounds. There are no two-story structures.”

“Nonsense!” said the director. He led a team of officers on a search of the grounds, including the nuns’ sleeping quarters, but failed to see any two-story structures.

“How very strange!” said the director. He then ordered one of the nuns to follow him to another spot, where he asked her a few trivial questions and had her taken away. Then he summoned the other three and exploded in rage, saying, “How dare you lie to me! That one confessed, saying there is indeed a two-story house on the grounds. Why did you deny it? How crafty! How abominable! Apply the squeezers to them!”

Panic-stricken, the nuns confessed: “There is indeed such a house. It’s accessible through the paper door next to a bed.”

“Now you’re talking! Why did you lie to me before?”

“We wouldn’t dare lie to you, Your Honor. It’s just that there are several ladies of high status in the house (MC: The secret is out.), so we didn’t dare tell the truth.”

At the police chief’s order, the nuns opened the paper door and led the director and four or five officers down a winding corridor all the way to a staircase. On hearing laughter from upstairs, the director came to a halt and told the officers, “You go up. If you see a nun, bring her down to me.”

Thus ordered, the officers stormed upstairs. Lo and behold! Two girls, three older women, and a nun were sitting there, drinking. Appalled at the sight of yamen officers bursting into the room, they scattered every which way to take cover. Acting in unison, the officers dragged the delicate-looking nun downstairs into the presence of the director. Director Yuan asked her where her bedroom was and sent the officers to search it. They found nineteen white silk kerchiefs, all bearing the stains of virgins’ hymenal blood. There was also a ledger with clear records of the names of the women who had stayed in the nunnery, complete with details as to the dates of their stays, the first day of arrival of Madam So-and-So, who recommended Madam So-and-So to the nunnery, and who was a virgin and who was not. (MC: Why did they make a record of such sordid details? Because they got carried away with their success. But had they not done so, this case would not have ended in a death sentence.)

On reading the ledger, Director Yuan was so enraged that he ordered all five nuns taken to the yamen. The women visitors in the nunnery, wondering what could have warranted the arrest of the nuns, swarmed out through the gate and headed for home in hired sedan-chairs.

After arriving at the yamen, the director ordered that torture be applied to the nuns. As they insisted that they were law-abiding nuns not guilty of any wrongdoing, the director summoned a midwife and had her examine the nuns one by one. At her report that they were indeed all female, the director was bewildered. He thought, “If so, what’s the explanation for the blood-stained kerchiefs and the ledger?” He told the midwife to approach him and asked her in a low voice, “Do you have any suspicions?”

The midwife replied, “My only suspicion is about the youngest nun. There’s nothing about her that suggests she’s not a woman, but she is a little different.”

The director was suddenly struck by a thought. “I’ve long heard about a way of drawing in the male member,” he said to himself. “If that nun looks a little different, she must be a man. I do recall a method that can make him show his true colors.” Thereupon, he ordered that cooking oil be applied to the nun’s private parts and that a dog be brought over. On catching the aroma of the oil, the dog stretched out its long tongue and licked at it nonstop. After about the tenth lick of its hot tongue, the nun could not bear the itch any longer and shuddered. Presto! His member stuck out and stayed hard. The nuns and the midwife quickly covered their faces. (MC: The nuns, no strangers to that equipment, need not have covered their faces.)

In a towering rage, the director roared, “Even death is not enough to exonerate such a scoundrel!” He barked the order for the man to be thrown to the floor and given forty hard strokes of the rods. The squeezer was also applied to him to make him confess his crime. The man saw no other way but to confess. “I used to be a mendicant monk in these parts,” said he. “I’ve always had girlish looks, and I learned about ways of drawing in and letting out my male member from my tutor. Able to deal with ten women in a single night, I’ve often assembled women for orgies in my practice of the teachings of the White Lotus Society. When I came to this nunnery in my wanderings as a mendicant monk, the nuns fell in love with me and kept me here. (IC: He is quite lovable.) So I told them that I was able to draw in my male member and pose as a woman. Thus I became the abbess, with easy access to ladies of the great houses, married and unmarried, and when they visited me, I induced them to sleep upstairs. No one suspected that anything was amiss. When I aroused their passions and let out my male member, most of them did not reject me. Some did, but I cast a spell on them so that I was able to have my way with them, and I didn’t break the spell until I had enough. So these women never came back after one night. The others are willing partners in the fun and look forward to a permanent relationship. I little dreamed that my secret would be exposed by you, Your Honor. I’m quite reconciled to a death sentence.”

While the confession was still going on, the owner of the mansion, having heard about the nuns’ arrest from his wife and daughters, had a letter delivered to the director, asking for clemency. In a rage, Director Yuan had the kerchiefs and the ledger sealed and delivered to the mansion, without even bothering to write a letter of reply. (MC: Wonderful!) On seeing these objects, the rich man was so ashamed that he only wished he could sink into the ground.

The director then wrote the following verdict:

This court finds the suspect, Wang So-and-So, from the region along the lower reaches of the Yangzi River, an unscrupulous and insolent criminal. He practiced the White Lotus cult to deceive people and posed as a woman in order to defile real women. In joining the Buddhist order, he should have sought enlightenment. Instead, he entered secluded boudoirs by disguising himself as Bodhisattva Guanyin. Who could tell whether he was a monk or a nun in his seated position, his palms joined, on the meditation bed? Who could tell whether he was a man or a woman when the shoes were shed and the body began to reveal itself ? It was as if a stork entering a phoenix’s nest claims a union or a snake slithering around a dragon cave seeks intimacy. The bright moon, in its innocence, shines on a boudoir but finds the woman with a male companion. The fresh breeze, seeking romance, enters a grand mansion and relieves the lonely one of her boredom. Nothing less than destruction of his dwelling and burning of his books will suffice to erase all traces of him. Nothing less than gouging out his heart and his eyes will suffice as punishment for his crime.

Next, the director ordered that all kinds of torture be applied to the man. How was a monk with a delicate constitution able to endure such excruciating pain? Soon he gave up the ghost. The four nuns were each given thirty strokes of the rod and sold by the yamen. The premises of the nunnery were demolished, and the young monk’s corpse was dumped into the Bodhisattva Guanyin Pond. Those who heard the news descended on the scene to view the body and, on seeing that oversize member of his, covered their mouths with their hands and giggled, saying, “No wonder he was a darling of the ladies!” Quite a few of the married women who had consorted with him committed suicide by hanging themselves on getting word of his arrest. That monk, after indulging in sexual depravity year after year, did not even have a proper burial place when he met his end. If he had ever had second thoughts and realized that there was no future in such a life, and if he had undergone a change of heart, quit being a monk, gotten himself a wife, and spent the rest of his life in peace, wouldn’t he have gone “unpunished by the law,” as some members of the audience put it? Well, when one has had a taste of the sweetness and gone so far, one will continue down the same road until death, against the dictates of one’s conscience, until death claims him. Therefore, once you find yourself on this road, chances are that you will most likely land yourself in trouble. Truly,

Good is returned with good and evil with evil;

Retribution is just a matter of time.

The above is a story about a man posing as a woman. I shall now proceed to one about a woman posing as a man, whose illicit love affair later leads to a proper marriage.

The story takes place in the Hongxi reign period [1425]. Outside the East Gate of Huzhou, there lived a Yang family. Mr. Yang, a Confucian scholar, had passed away, leaving behind his wife and a young son and a daughter. The daughter, age twelve as our story unfolds, was as pretty as a flower and had a quick mind. Her only drawback was her susceptibility to frequent bouts of minor illness. Her mother, most meticulous in her care of the girl, wished only for her to grow up well by the grace of the gods. There was simply nothing she would not do for that purpose.

One day, mother and daughter were engaged in embroidery when they saw a nun walk in. Mrs. Yang greeted her with joy. The nun was in fact the abbess of Cuifu Nunnery of Hangzhou. A long-standing acquaintance of Mrs. Yang’s, she had the gift of the gab and, in her deceitful ways, was prone to lust and indulged in debauchery with her two young disciples. And now, equipped with a packet of southern dates, a jar of autumn tea leaves, a plateful of ginkgo nuts, and a plateful of chestnuts, she was in Mrs. Yang’s house for a visit. After the customary exchange of civilities, the nun turned her eyes to the girl and saw that

She was slender and lissome

And full of grace and charm.

She was as fair as pear blossoms in the rain

And as delicate as peach blossoms in the breeze.

As she moved with mincing steps,

Her dainty shoes showed under her skirt.

As she was about to speak in her shyness,

Her cherry lips began to quiver.

Only a Feng Zhi would be unmoved;3

Even the man of Lu might be aroused.4

The nun asked, “How old is the young lady?”

The mother replied, “Twelve. She’s a bright and clever girl. There’s only one drawback that I can’t do anything about: she has a weak constitution and is prone to indispositions. How I wish I could switch places with her! This is the one thing that worries me.”

“Have you ever made a votive pledge to the Buddha and prayed for the Buddha’s blessing?”

“Oh, I’ve tried everything! I’ve been praying to the gods and the Buddha and making votive vows to the stars, but nothing worked. Some star of bad luck must have entered her fate and refuses to budge.”

“Yes, this must be the work of fate,” said the nun. “Please show me her eight-character natal chart and let me tell her fortune.”5

“I never knew that Your Reverence could also tell fortunes!”

So saying, Mrs. Yang told her the eight characters that represented the year, the month, the day, and the hour of her daughter’s birth, whereupon the nun put on an exaggerated show of giving herself up to thought. Eventually, she said, “Judging from her natal chart, I believe she would be well advised to leave you and live elsewhere.”

“I’d hate to be separated from her, but if that’s what it takes to cure her, so be it! But the only way to do that is for some family to adopt her, and I can’t think of a candidate in the rush of the moment.”

“Is she engaged to be married?”

“No, she hasn’t been spoken for.”

“Your daughter is fated to remain unmarried. If you betroth her, her illnesses will break out in full force. (MC: She is not meant to remain unmarried. On the contrary, a blissful marriage is in her stars.) There is a way. And it’s the only way that fits her destiny perfectly and will give her good health and a long life. But I can hardly bring it up, because you certainly won’t have the heart to agree to it.”

“As long as she gets well, I don’t mind where she goes.”

“If you can bear to part with her, I recommend that she be sent to a nunnery. As someone who doesn’t belong to the mundane world, she will be spared calamities and be richly blessed. This is the best way out.”

“That’s indeed a good idea, Your Reverence. This will be a work of great merit. The Buddha be praised! (MC: An incurable habit of womenfolk.) I do hate to part with my girl, but it’s better than to see her die from illness and pain. There’s simply no other choice. I’m glad that I got to know you, thanks to some predestined bond between us. If you don’t find her beneath you, could you please take her on as a disciple?”

“Your daughter is richly blessed by fate. Her joining our nunnery will win credit for us in the eyes of the Buddha. The honor will be mine, but I’m hardly qualified to be her teacher.”

“That’s no way to talk. Whatever favor you do her will be a relief to me.”

“What a thing to say, madam! She’ll be doing me such an honor. I’ll never fail to show her proper respect. My nunnery may be poor, but with help from our donors, we won’t be short of food and clothing. You need not worry.”

“So let me pick a day and deliver her to your nunnery,” said Mrs. Yang. As she checked the calendar, tears kept streaming from her eyes. (MC: She is bringing grief upon herself.)

After the nun soothed her with comforting words, she chose a date and asked the nun to stay at her home for a few days. When the chosen day came around, she hired a boat and sent her daughter on her way with the nun. Mother and daughter fell on each other’s shoulders and cried their hearts out.

After bidding farewell to her mother, the girl went to the nunnery with the abbess and, upon arrival, exchanged greetings with the nuns and officially acknowledged the abbess as her tutor. On a chosen day, she took the tonsure and was given the Buddhist name Jingguan. Henceforth, Miss Yang became a nun at Cuifu Nunnery, all because Mrs. Yang lacked a mind of her own. There is a poem in testimony:

She may be prone to illnesses,

But death may not be right at her door.

By rashly sending her to a temple,

Her mother was to let her choose her own bridegroom.

You may well ask, why did the nun goad Mrs. Yang into making her daughter join the Buddhist order? It’s because she needed lovely girls in her nunnery to serve as bait, to attract patrons for the illicit activities that went on in the nunnery. Miss Yang’s beauty impressed her. With the mother open to any of her ideas for the sake of the girl’s health, she saw her chance and, under the pretext of telling the girl’s fortune, coaxed the mother into letting the girl become her disciple. At twelve years of age, the girl had not yet reached puberty and therefore did not mind the arrangement. Had she been several years older, she would have preferred death rather than submission.

After becoming a nun, Miss Yang went home to see her mother a few times a year—sometimes by herself, sometimes with the abbess. In the old days, Mrs. Yang, with her love for her daughter, always made too much fuss over the girl’s indispositions, however slight they were, thereby all too often giving herself undue worries. (MC: This is what excessive maternal love can lead to.) Now that the girl had moved out and any minor illnesses were out of her sight, she was spared a great deal of vexation. Better still, the girl looked healthy during her frequent visits home, and to dispel her mother’s worries, she always insisted that none of her illnesses had ever recurred. Convinced that she had made the right decision in sending her daughter to the nunnery, Mrs. Yang stopped worrying about her.

Our story branches at this point. In Huangsha Lane of Huzhou, there lived an untitled scholar named Wenren Jia. His ancestors were from Shaoxing, but since his grandfather used to teach in a private school in Wucheng, he had acquired local residency status. He was as handsome as Pan An and as talented as Cao Zhi.6 At seventeen years of age, he lived in poverty with his forty-year-old mother. He was still a bachelor. His youthful good looks, elegant manner, graceful air, and knowledge won him respect from all his friends, and donations often came his way. His presence was indispensable at dinner parties and excursions, and his absence at their gatherings was a source of regret to his friends.

One day, in the middle of the first lunar month, when plum blossoms were in full bloom, a young friend of his engaged a pleasure boat and invited him on a trip to Hangzhou to view the plum blossoms at West Creek. After telling his mother about it, Wenren joined his friend on the trip. On arriving in Hangzhou the next day, his friend said, “Let’s go to West Creek to look at the plum blossoms first. We’ll go into the city proper tomorrow.” And so he told the boatmen to head for West Creek.

They arrived before two hours were out. With the boat moored at the shore, Wenren and his friend went ashore on foot, and the servants followed behind, carrying wine and boxes of food.

After they had covered the better part of a li, they saw a grove of pine trees looming ahead, each with a trunk so thick that one could hardly get one’s arms around it. Half hidden among the trees stood a nunnery surrounded by whitewashed walls. A small creek flowed in front of the two-panel gate set in the south-facing section of the wall. It was truly a secluded place. The two men walked up to the gate and peered around. The gate was closed, but there seemed to be curious eyes behind it.

“What a nice, quiet nunnery!” said the friend. “Shall we knock at the gate and ask for a cup of tea before we continue with our trip?”

Wenren replied, “Let’s go see the plum blossoms first, before it’s too late. We can come here again on our way back.”

“Good point,” conceded the friend. So they swung around and went on their way.

Before long, they arrived at West Creek, where plum blossoms were at their best. Behold:

Patches of bright silver dazzle the eye;

Row upon row of jade pieces stretch afar.

The fragrance carried by the gentle breeze

Is more pleasant than Jia Wu’s stolen incense.7

With the white petals glistening in the radiant sun,

Xishi in her makeup pales in comparison.8

The graceful boughs proudly withstood ice and frost;

The mottled shadows are alluring in their charm.

When will the poets ever stop singing their praises?

When will the wine cups ever run dry?

The two men lingered amid the flowers for some time before they had the wine and food boxes brought to them and began drinking to their hearts’ content. As the day waned and their wine was about to give out, they started back to their boat, half drunk. In their eagerness to press ahead in the gathering darkness, they had no time to spare for the nunnery. Hastily, they boarded the boat, and the next morning, they went ashore when they came to the grove of pine trees, and there we shall leave them for now.

The nunnery they had seen was none other than Cuifu Nunnery, where Miss Yang was living. Jingguan, for such was her Buddhist name, was now sixteen years of age, an even greater beauty than before, and of a gentle and serene nature. Of the lay visitors to the nunnery, some ogled her and some made suggestive remarks to her. On such occasions, the other nuns would giggle, offer their services, and eagerly dance attendance on them, but she would remain indifferent and unconcerned. Whenever she happened to witness the other nuns engaging in improper behavior, she turned a blind eye and sat quietly behind a closed door reading ancient books and writing a few lines of verse. (MC: A model for decent young women.) And there she stayed until there was a good reason to emerge from her seclusion.

Quite by coincidence, she happened to have come out for a little walk when Mr. Wenren was loitering around the nunnery, and she was the one peeping out from behind the gate. As she fixed her gaze on Wenren, she was so impressed by his otherworldly grace that after he went off, she wished she could run after him and look her fill. Languidly, she went back to her room, thinking, “How can there be such a handsome young man in this world? Could he be a divine being from heaven? I have only one life to live. Would that I could devote mine to him! Wouldn’t that be a blissful marriage? And yet, since I’m already stuck in this place, I’d better give up the idea.” She gave a sigh and fought back her tears. Truly,

A mute tasting bitter cork-tree bark

Can hardly express its bitterness.

Dear audience, mark this: Those who have joined the Buddhist order must detach their minds from all aspects of the physical world. An accomplished Buddhist is one who has laid all desires to rest and is completely devoted to Buddhism with no stirrings of sensation in the practice of the religion day and night. But in this day and age, parents arbitrarily send their children to the temples at every opportunity. Little do they know that the life of a Buddhist may get harder as the children grow up. As for those who enter the monastic life after they have reached puberty and are not strangers to romantic longings, they do so under pressure, not of their own free will. That is why those prone to stirring up trouble commit acts that drag the reputation of monasteries through the mud. As they say, “Avoiding sins is better than doing good deeds.” Be advised: Do not make your children take that path. (MC: These comments are quite enlightening.) But I am wandering from my story.

More than four months went by quickly since Mr. Wenren had returned from Hangzhou. It being a year for the civil service examinations at the provincial level, Mr. Wenren obtained permission from circuit authorities, on a priority basis, to take the examinations. It was the sixth lunar month, but the weather was not as hot as it usually is at this time of year. And so Wenren packed for his journey to Hangzhou. He had an aunt, a widow whose deceased husband, Mr. Huang, had been a director in the Hangzhou yamen. She had invited him to pick an airy room in her residence and stay for a while in quiet seclusion. His friends having provided him with traveling money ahead of his departure date, he made arrangements for his mother and hired a boat. Taking along his page boy A-si and his bags of books, he set out on his journey.

His boat had just gone through the East Gate when a young monk by the shore called out in Huzhou dialect, “Is this boat headed for Hangzhou?”

The boatman replied, “Yes. I’m taking an exam candidate up there.”

“Could you please also take me along? I’ll be paying my own way.”

“Why are you going to Hangzhou, Your Reverence?” asked the boatman.

“I’m from the Temple of Soul’s Retreat, now on my way back to the temple after a visit home.”

“I’ll have to check with the gentleman in the cabin,” replied the boatman. “It’s not up to me.”

At this point, A-si the page boy emerged from the cabin and shouted, “What a nuisance, that little bald donkey! My master is on his way to the examination grounds to get a high pass, and here you come, an unlucky bald thing! Go away! Or I’ll give you a splash of water to clean your ball of a head!” (MC: The words of a petty man.)

You may ask, where does that expression come from? Well, someone had said derisively of monks, “Monks’ heads are not meant to do good for all; they only assume the shape of balls.” A-si had picked up that coarse expression from exchanges of jocular remarks between his master and houseguests and was now applying it to the young monk.

“I was just asking if the boatman would take me on board. I can’t have offended anyone. Why all this hostility?”

Having heard the commotion, Mr. Wenren pushed open the window of his cabin and took a liking to the delicate-looking monk. On hearing that he was from the Monastery of Soul’s Retreat, he thought, “That monastery is known for its scenic splendors. Why don’t I take this monk on board and make a friend of him? It would be nice if I could stay at his monastery.” So he rushed out and said harshly to A-si, “Where are your manners? What’s the harm in having His Reverence as a travel companion on our way to Hangzhou?”

In fact, this was all destined to happen. On hearing these words, the boatman pulled the boat in to shore. The monk gave a start at the sight of Mr. Wenren. While boarding the boat, he kept his eyes fixed on Wenren. In the meantime, Wenren thought, “I’ve never seen a better-looking monk. He’s as pretty as a woman. If he were a woman, wouldn’t she be a ravishing beauty? Too bad he’s a man.” (MC: Wenren is getting it completely wrong.)

After an exchange of greetings, the monk entered the cabin and sat down. The wind happened to be favorable at this time, so the sail was hoisted, and the boat went off at flying speed.

The two men in the cabin asked each other’s name and, on learning that they were natives of the same place and spoke the same dialect, they felt all the more drawn to each other. Impressed by the monk’s refined speech, Wenren thought, “This is not just any monk.”

The monk, on his part, kept looking at Wenren with his sparkling eyes. The weather being suffocatingly hot, Wenren asked him if he wanted to take off a layer of his upper garment. The monk replied, “Heat doesn’t bother me, but you go ahead and do whatever pleases you.”

As it was getting late, they ate some supper, and Wenren asked the monk if he would like to take a bath. The monk declined, so Wenren himself took a bath. Being tired by this time, Wenren flung himself on his bed, and A-si went to the stern to sleep. Only after everybody had fallen asleep and all had become quiet did the monk put out the lamp, take off his clothes, and get into Wenren’s bed. But sleep eluded him as he tossed and turned, sighing all the time. Noticing that Wenren was sound asleep, he quietly sat up and began stroking him with a hand. Wenren happened to wake up at this time. As Wenren stretched and yawned, the monk swiftly withdrew his hand and quietly lay down to sleep. But Wenren had sensed what was going on. He thought, “So this monk is trying to seduce me. He’s such a pretty one that his abbot probably doesn’t leave him in peace, so he’s become an old hand at this business. So why don’t I enjoy this young man? Why waste what’s to be had for the taking?”

Being in the prime of his youth, Wenren crawled to the other side of bed and lay head to head with the monk. When he stretched out a hand to touch the monk, the latter, all curled up, lay there and didn’t say a word. As Wenren made a second attempt, his hands rested on two soft breasts. “This little monk is by no means obese,” he thought. “Why does he have such nice breasts?” Then, as he tried to reach down to his buttocks, the monk, as if in fear, quickly turned to lie face up. Still trying to reach down from the front, Wenren gave a start and exclaimed, “My goodness! Tell me the truth! Who are you?”

“Please keep your voice down. I’m a nun, claiming to be a monk because it’s awkward for a woman to be traveling alone.”

“This only tightens the predestined bond between us! I can’t pass you up!” Without another word, he mounted her.

“Please consider that I’m still a virgin. (IC: Hard to come by!) Please be gentle.”

At the height of his passion, Wenren was oblivious to her pleas. Like a flower bud that had never experienced wind and rain, the nun offered a poor defense against Wenren as he tried to enter her. When she finally lost her virginity, she saw nothing for it but to frown, gnash her teeth, and bear the pain.

When the intimacy was over, Wenren said, “I still feel as if I were in a dream, meeting a fairy maiden without having done anything to deserve it. Please tell me more about yourself and where you live, so that we can see each other more often in the future.”

“I’m from the Yang family outside the East Gate of Huzhou. My mother made the mistake of sending me off to Cuifu Nunnery of West Creek. My Buddhist name is Jingguan. There are male visitors at the nunnery, but they’re all vulgar men of low class. None of them impress me. In the first month of this year, I was taking a walk by the gate of the nunnery when I saw you standing there. I found your distinguished looks so admirable that I lost my peace of mind. I never expected to be able to meet you in such circumstances, like a fish finding water. All this turned out the way I’ve wanted for so long, so I didn’t resist. I’m not a loose woman. I don’t want you to take this as a one-night stand. I do wish for a lifelong and proper relationship with you.”

“Are your parents still alive?”

“My father, Yang So-and-So, passed away long ago. I have only my mother and my brother now. I was on my way to see my mother yesterday when I ran into you. Are you married?”

“Not yet. But now I’ve met you, nothing less than a fairy maiden, and we’re a perfect match in age and appearance. What’s more, you’re from a renowned Confucian scholar’s family, and of the same county, too. How can you languish away in this place? We must work out a long-term plan.”

“I’m already yours. I’ll never be unfaithful. But everything today happened so quickly that I can’t come up with a good plan on the spur of the moment. My nunnery isn’t far from the city and is quite cool and quiet. You can stay there and study. We have acolytes who bring in food, so you need not go to any expense, and we’ll be able to meet easily. We can then work out something when the opportunity comes up. What do you think?”

“That’s a good idea, but I’m afraid the other nuns will object.”

“Apart from the abbess, who’s a lustful woman in her late thirties, there are only two other nuns, who are about twenty years old. Neither knows what chastity is. I’ve seen all the men they associate with. None of the men have your looks. So the nuns will surely like you. You can get acquainted with them so that we can do what we want to do when an opportunity presents itself. My only fear is that you’ll refuse to stay. You have nothing to fear from them. They’ll surely agree to take you in!”

Immensely pleased on hearing this, Wenren said, “A brilliant idea, my fairy maiden! So let’s go to the pine grove first thing in the morning and tell my page boy to go back home on the boat, and I’ll go with you to your nunnery.”

After this conversation, the two again fell into each other’s embrace and resumed their union of delight. Truly,

He had never experienced such joy;

Once he did, all his bones turned cold.

Unsure if all this was real or a dream,

Time and again, he peered around in the dark.

After their passion abated, the roosters announced the break of dawn. Afraid of being seen, Jingguan hurriedly threw on some clothes and got up. The boatman immediately began to set the boat in motion, and A-si also rose, to help his master wash and comb his hair. After breakfast, they went through the city gate while it was still early.

A-si suggested, “Let’s stop the boat here, so that we can ask for directions to Director Huang’s residence.”

“No, there’s no need to stop here,” said Wenren. “There are vacant rooms in this young monk’s temple. Let’s go ashore at the pine grove.”

On reaching the pine grove, Wenren said that he was going to the Monastery of Soul’s Retreat and engaged a porter to carry all his luggage. Turning to A-si, he continued, “Now, you go back home on this boat. Tell the old lady not to worry about me. I’ll be studying at the monastery. After the exam is over, I’ll return home by myself, and there’s no need to send messengers for me.” Having thus dismissed the page boy, he watched the boat make its way back before hiring two sedan-chairs for Jingguan and himself to go to Cuifu Nunnery. The porter followed behind, as instructed.

Soon, they arrived. After the sedan-chair carriers and the porter were paid, Jingguan led Wenren into the nunnery and announced, “This gentleman wants to stay here while preparing for the examinations.”

The nuns, all smiles, looked their fill at Wenren in a frenzy of delight. They lavished attention on him, served him tea, cleaned up a nice room, and put his luggage away. (MC: No need to prepare a separate room.) After dinner was over and everyone had taken a bath, the abbess, following the usual practice in such situations, was the first one to enjoy the male visitor, after which the other two nuns fought each other for his favor and took turns playing his companion in bed. Jingguan maintained her composure and refrained from joining in their frolics, thus winning the nuns’ gratitude. (MC: She has deeper motives.) After a month went by in this fashion, Wenren could not stand the strain any longer, so the women fed him ginseng soup, a drink made from Elsholtzia, hearts of lotus seeds, and longan, to fortify him. There was nothing they would not do for him, to his great gratification.

Before anyone knew it, the seventh day of the seventh lunar month rolled around, followed by the Ullambhana Festival.9 It was a custom for the people of Hangzhou to hold prayer services and set lit lanterns afloat on the river.

On the twelfth day of the month, a prominent family sent a messenger to the nunnery to request a prayer service, a request that the abbess granted. When the other nuns entered her cell, she said, “We’ll be holding a prayer service away from the premises for three days, from the thirteenth to the fifteenth. With Mr. Wenren here, one of us must stay, to keep him company. Won’t she be having the best of it?”

Jingguan kept silent as the two other nuns fought each other for the privilege. The abbess said, “A prayer service can’t do without me, so I’m out of the picture. It was Jingguan who brought Mr. Wenren here in the first place. You two have had enough fun with him. It’s only fair to let Jingguan keep him company this time.” (MC: The abbess is being fair. It’s also because of her regard for Mrs. Yang.)

“Yes, it’s fair, Your Reverence,” said the two nuns, to Jingguan’s inner delight. And so the other nuns went to pack their ritual objects and boxes of sutras. Even the old acolytes joined them on the trip.

After seeing everyone off at the gate, Jingguan went back inside and said to Wenren, “Staying here is no solution in the long run. We need a plan. The exam date will soon be upon you. If you grow enamored of this place, you’ll not only fail the exams but also lose your health.”

“You think I don’t know that? I forced myself to get involved with them only because I can’t tear myself away from you. I’m doing this against my wishes!”

“When I first met you, I did want to follow you and extricate myself from the nunnery, but if I disappeared on my way home, the abbess would surely track me down to my mother’s home. That’s why I couldn’t do it. But now, having been back here for so long, I can easily slip out of here with you while no one’s around. Because they’ve all been involved with you, they ought to be afraid of being exposed, and so they won’t give chase.”

“No, that’s not an option. I’m a scholar, and I have my mother to consider. If you and I flee this place and go to my home, my mother will be appalled, and she may not want to accept you. What’s more, if the abbess tries to track you down and alerts the police, my career prospects will be doomed. And there’s no telling what they’ll do to you. This is out of the question. My idea is that if I pass the exams, I’ll easily be able to marry you.”

“But success on the exams at the provincial level doesn’t give you the right to marry a nun. And what if you fail? So that’s not a long-term solution either. Since I joined the Buddhist order, I’ve been copying sutras and writing letters on commission and made about a hundred taels of silver. I can use the money for my travel expenses and find a temporary place to stay. After you succeed on the exams, we can take our time going home. Wouldn’t that be good?”

After a moment’s reflection, Wenren said, “Yes, that makes sense. I have an aunt whose deceased husband, Mr. Huang, used to be an official in Hangzhou. My aunt is a devout Buddhist. She has a small nunnery on her estate and never fails to make offerings of incense every morning and night. The old nun who takes care of the little nunnery used to be my wet nurse. Let me tell my aunt about you and take you to her nunnery, with my old wet nurse as your companion. Her husband used to be an official. Who would dare ask her probing questions? In the meantime, you can let your hair grow. After I succeed on the exams, we’ll be married with all proper ceremony. Won’t that be wonderful? Even if I don’t succeed, your hair will have grown out, and you can go everywhere freely.”

“Good idea,” conceded Jingguan. “We have no time to lose. Let’s start on our way now! Another three days, and we won’t be able to do anything.”

Right away, Wenren hastened to his aunt’s house. After an exchange of greetings, his aunt said, “I’ve been waiting for so long for you to come and sit for the exams. Why are you here only now? Do you have a place to stay?”

“Let me tell you something, Aunt: It was while I was looking for a place to stay that I ran into trouble. I need your help now.”

“What is it?”

Lapsing into falsehood, he said, “I used to have a Buddhist tutor named Mr. Yang. He died many years ago. His only daughter was a childhood friend of mine. Later, she was abducted by a nun and nothing was heard from her again. When I was looking for a quiet place to stay in the West Creek area, I happened to run into her at Cuifu Nunnery. She’s now quite a beauty. She doesn’t like her life at the nunnery and wants to be with me wherever I go. There’s a predestined marriage bond between us, and she’s the daughter of my old teacher, too. So I just can’t say no to her. But I’m here as an exam candidate, and I don’t want any trouble. I can’t very well take her home while her head is still shaved. With the exams approaching soon, I don’t have the time to appeal to the authorities for justice for her, and I don’t have the money to offer bribes. Aunt, you have a nunnery on your estate, and my old wet nurse is there taking care of the incense. My idea is to let the young lady stay there temporarily. Even if her own nunnery learns about this, it won’t be a big deal because she’s still in a nunnery, living with women. If no one tracks her down, then I’d like to marry her after the exams are over. Please help me out, Aunt!”

His aunt laughed. “So you found a Chen Miaochang and want help from me!10 (IC: The aunt is an interesting person.) I don’t blame you, since she’s your teacher’s daughter. But if you want to marry her, you must not put her in a nunnery, because if you young people want to see each other, I don’t want you to sully my nunnery. I have vacant rooms in the house that are nice and quiet. I’ll get one ready for her and tell her to let her hair grow. I’ll also assign a maidservant to her. You’re at liberty to visit her often. At night, if she’s lonely, she can have your wet nurse as a companion. That will work out nicely in more ways than one.”

“If so, I’ll be ever so grateful to you, Aunt, for giving me a new lease on life! I’ll go at once to bring her here to greet you.”

After he left his aunt and went out through the gate, he hired a sedan-chair and went straight to Cuifu Nunnery. (MC: The sedan-chair is to hide his identity.) Once in the nunnery, he relayed his aunt’s words to Jingguan, to the latter’s immense delight. She immediately began to pack the things she would need.

“After I hide you away and they come back here, I’ll continue to visit them from time to time so that they won’t suspect me. (IC: Wonderful.) My luggage can be left here for now.”

“Could it be that you can’t bring yourself to sever your ties with them?”

“No! You have my undivided love. I don’t love anyone else. But I have to sever ties like a cicada sloughing off its skin, in an unobtrusive way. If they find out beyond any doubt that I’m behind all this with the exam date approaching, what will happen if they bring a lawsuit against me and block me from taking the exams?”

“I usually travel home by myself. If they ask you, you can just say that you were away and have no idea where I went. That way, they’ll think I’ve gone home to visit my mother, so they may not give chase. Later, by the time they learn that I’m not with my mother, your exams will be over and we’ll have left this area by another arrangement. You’re not a native of this prefecture. They won’t be able to find you. Even if they do, you can just deny all their charges.”

Having thus made up their minds, Jingguan mounted the sedan-chair. Wenren closed the gate of the nunnery and followed the sedan-chair on foot all the way to his aunt’s house.

The aunt liked Jingguan, with her shaved head, fair complexion, peachy cheeks, and soft skin. Delighted, she said, “No wonder my nephew fell in love with you! Now you take a room in the inner part of the house. No unauthorized person will dare intrude. You have nothing to worry about.” Turning to Wenren, she continued, “If you lodge here and you’re tracked down, I’m afraid there would be unpleasantness. What’s more, you need to be closer to the examination grounds. So you’ll have to find another place to stay.”

“You’re right, Aunt. I’ll limit myself to brief visits.”

And so, Jingguan settled down in Mrs. Huang’s residence. Wenren stayed the night in her room and departed the next morning to find lodgings elsewhere, but we will leave him and come back to the three nuns.

On returning to the nunnery after three days of prayer service, the three nuns found the gate closed but not bolted from within, as it should have been. When they entered the grounds but saw no one, they wondered in alarm, “Where are they?” They were more concerned about Wenren than Jingguan. When they charged into Wenren’s room and found his luggage and bookcases intact, they began to relax. (MC: Just as Wenren had expected.) But Jingguan was nowhere to be seen, and her room was found to be spotlessly clean. Mystified, they were debating what to do when Wenren entered with unhurried steps. The nuns burst into smiles and exclaimed, “He’s here! He’s here!”

With one sweep of her arms, the abbess held him tightly and, without sparing a moment to inquire after Jingguan, said laughingly, “The itch is unbearable after a three-day separation. Let’s go have some fun in my room.” (MC: The abbess is raring to go.) Oblivious to the other two sex-crazed nuns, the abbess took Wenren off. With an effort, Wenren played up to her. Only after her passion had abated did she ask, “Wasn’t Jingguan with you here? Where did she go?”

“I spent the whole day yesterday in the city. Then it got so late that I stayed the night with a friend, and I’ve just gotten back. I have no idea where she is.”

When the other two nuns saw him, they said, “After you left, Jingguan must have felt so lonely that she went back to Huzhou. She was here enjoying you for two long days. It’s our turn now. We’ll let her stay there for a while longer before we do anything about her.”

They were so occupied with Wenren that they banished Jingguan from their thoughts. Little did they know that Wenren’s heart was elsewhere. After muddling through a few more days, he announced that he must find lodgings near the examination grounds. The nuns could not very well stop him from doing that, and so he left with his luggage. Over and over again, the nuns reminded him, “Whenever you have some free time, be sure to come here and stay for a while!”

Wenren readily gave his consent before he took himself off.

After a few more days went by without any news about Jingguan, the abbess began to feel uneasy and sent a messenger to ask Mrs. Yang. On getting the reply that Jingguan had not gone home, the abbess grew alarmed. Afraid that Mrs. Yang would come to the nunnery to look for her daughter, the abbess dared not raise a fuss about it and confined herself to making furtive inquiries. As Wenren also failed to show up after his departure, she began to have some misgivings. She wanted to look him up and subject him to some rigorous questioning but, not knowing where he was, had to put up with the suspense in the hope that he would make an appearance once the exams were over. However, all three sessions of the exams were soon over, but not even a shadow of Wenren showed up as the days passed. In fact, pleased with his performance on the exams, Wenren had gone to his aunt’s residence and moved in with Jingguan. Cuifu Nunnery could not have been further from his thoughts.

Bitterly disappointed, the abbess and the two nuns said spitefully, “How can he be so heartless! Maybe he abducted Jingguan. There can’t be any other explanation for his absence.” They thought of bringing a case against him with the yamen on charges of abduction, but afraid they might have a lot of explaining to do, they gave up the idea lest they get themselves into trouble. (MC: As Jingguan had predicted.) They discussed whether to go to the examination grounds to look for him or to his home in Huzhou to confront him. While they were thus talking, unable to make up their minds, which is the way with women, another intriguing incident happened.

In the midst of their conversation, they heard vehement knocks on the gate. The nuns thought, “Could it be Mr. Wenren?” With one accord, they went out and threw the gate open. One large sedan-chair and three or four smaller ones were parked out front, and the servant who had knocked at the gate announced the arrival of a distinguished lady from out of town. With alacrity, the abbess walked up to greet her. As the distinguished lady emerged from the large sedan-chair, her maidservants also stepped out of the smaller ones and guided her into the nunnery. After the guest had sat down and was made comfortable, an exchange of civilities ensued, and tea was served. The lady said to her servants, “Go wait for me in the boat. I’ll spend some time here and board the boat in the afternoon.” The servants departed.

On entering the abbess’s cell, the lady said, “I haven’t been here for three years, since my husband died.”

“Your Ladyship must be gracing this humble nunnery with your illustrious presence in order to offer incense upon completion of the mourning period,” said the abbess.

“Exactly.”

“What better time than this to enjoy the sights and sounds of autumn!” said the abbess.

With a sigh, the lady replied, “I’m in no mood to enjoy the autumn.”

Catching on to her tone, the abbess said teasingly, “Is it because you’re too lonely after you lost your husband?”

The lady rose, closed the door, and said to the abbess, “You’ve always been in my confidence, so don’t think of me as an outsider. I’ve got something hush-hush to tell you. You were just saying that I felt lonely. Well, I feel restless after only three years, but your abstinence lasts a whole lifetime. How do you deal with it?”

“Who says we observe abstinence? I’m not going to hide anything from you. Thanks to an occasional partner or two, we don’t die of boredom.”

“Do you have anyone on hand now?”

“Yes, a dashing one, a young scholar, here to take the exams. But he’s been away for a couple of days. We’re trying to come up with a plan to get him back.”

“This can be put on hold. Now, I have a nice job for you. If you put your heart into it, you’ll surely be in for a lot of fun.”

“What is it?”

“The other day, I went to offer incense at Zhaoqing Monastery and took a room there for the night. There was an extremely beautiful young monk who hadn’t yet taken the tonsure. I’ll be frank with you. Having abstained for so long, I couldn’t help being aroused. As he served me tea, knowing that nothing was taboo at his age, he captured my heart with his clever tongue. I was so carried away that I dismissed all the servants, carried him to my bed, and told him to try his you-know-what on me. It turned out that the boy was quite an expert and even better than adults. All my thoughts are with him, and I just can’t do without him. I spent that whole night thinking about how to take him to my home. But being a widow, I’m not supposed to associate with strange men, so as not to spoil my name. And yet, always feeling ill at ease and having to dodge prying eyes aren’t my idea of having fun. Here’s what I propose to you: Let him take the tonsure here, in your nunnery. With his delicate features, he could easily pass as a nun. (MC: So she wants an illicit relationship with a monk through the intervention of a nun.) After I go home, you can take him to me, claiming that you two, tutor and disciple, are here to seek my patronage. I’ll install you in my private nunnery. Even members of my family will take you to be the tutor of the little nun. That way, I’ll be able to enjoy myself to the full, and no one will be any the wiser. (MC: Very crafty.) So this is my big job for you. If you take it, you’ll be in for some fun as well. Once you have that boy, you’ll be able to forget that lover of yours.”

“That’s indeed a wonderful idea. But if I become part of this, I’m afraid Your Ladyship may become jealous.”

“I want your help. Why would I be jealous of you? I’ll also let you share my bed so as not to arouse suspicions. Won’t that be nice?” (MC: She does take the long view.)

“My dear lady,” said the abbess, “in that case, I’ll do it for you, even if I have to die for it! I have three disciples here, one of whom disappeared some days ago. So by a lucky chance, your boy can replace her, which will work out even better for keeping this a secret. The only problem is, how are you going to get him here?”

“I told him to come here on his own. He promised to be with me without letting the abbot know. He should be here any moment now.”

In the midst of their conversation, one of the nuns knocked at the door and then entered to say, “There’s a young man with tied-up hair outside, asking for her ladyship.”

The lady hastened to say, “Yes, that’s him! Bring him in!”

As the young man made his way in, the two nuns, impressed by his good looks, beamed from ear to ear. On seeing him, the lady nodded and told him to enter the cell. As he bowed to the abbess, the latter kept her eyes glued on him. The lady grabbed his hand (MC: The smugness!) and said to the abbess, “What did I tell you!”

“My vision got blurry,” said the abbess. “And I went limp when I thought I saw Sudhana.”11

The lady burst out laughing.

When the abbess went to the kitchen to oversee the preparation of the meal and told the two nuns what had happened, both said, sucking their fingers, “This is unbelievable!”

The abbess continued, “So I’ll be leaving with her.”

One of the nuns said, “Could you be leaving us behind to enjoy life for yourself ?”

“This is what Heaven has bestowed on me. And I don’t think you’ll have any less fun in this place.”

After they spent some time bantering, the abbess returned to her cell, where the lady was holding the young man in her arms and talking. At the sight of the abbess, she quickly took a packet of ten taels of silver out of a small box and, handing it to the abbess, said, “This is my pledge. I’m leaving him here for now and going home on my boat. Within ten days, I’ll be expecting the two of you at my home. Don’t fail me.” After giving a few more words of instruction to the young man, the lady went out into the dining room, ate a simple vegetarian meal, and went off in her sedan-chair.

After seeing her off and closing the gate, the abbess went back inside. To her, the young man was as precious as an illustrious pearl shining in the darkness. She gathered him into her arms, kissed him on the lips, and caressed him with her hands. When the young man found himself aroused and that member of his rose, the abbess hastened to shove her pants down and meet it. After cavorting with him for a while, she said in indescribable delight, “From now on, Her Ladyship and I will be sharing you, but for the next few nights, you’re mine.” After they were done, she took a razor and shaved his head. On taking a close look, she said, amused, “You look just like Jingguan. Now that you’re here, you’ll need a Buddhist name. Why not take the name Jingguan?” That night, the young man slept in the abbess’s bed, to the frustration of the two young nuns.

The next day, after she had packed, the abbess hired a boat for her journey. She gave these words of instruction to the two nuns: “You stay on. If I like it there, I’ll send you a message. If I don’t come back, you may feel free to go your separate ways and return home. If Mrs. Yang sends someone to find out about Jingguan, just say that she followed the abbess to another town.”

The two nuns could hardly wait to see the abbess go so that they could each return home. They emphatically gave her their promise, saying, “Of course.” And so the abbess and the young man boarded the boat together, claiming to be tutor and pupil but becoming husband and wife at night. Before many days had passed, they arrived at the lady’s residence and, with the young man posing as a nun, entered the private nunnery and settled down. From time to time, the lady brought the abbess and the disciple into her own bedchamber, where all three spent the nights together in one bed. The nun taught the lady a host of techniques. (MC: She’s an old hand at this business.) With the two women sharing the young man, they enjoyed their fornication to the fullest. The young man was no match for the two middle-aged women. A few years later, he fell ill and died. The lady became so depressed that she also died soon thereafter. As for the abbess, the lady’s family members, setting themselves against her, accused her of stealing. She was thrown into prison, the stolen goods were recovered from her, and she died there, but I’m getting ahead of myself.

Let us come back to Cuifu Nunnery. After the abbess’s departure, no one brought up Jingguan again, and Jingguan was able to live on Wenren’s aunt’s estate in peace and quiet. After the list of successful exam candidates was made public, with Wenren’s name among the top five, he exultantly went to see his aunt. In private, he also saw Jingguan. Both were filled with joy. Henceforth, after disposing of his business as someone fresh from his success on the exams during the day, he spent his nights with Jingguan on his aunt’s estate. (MC: What happiness!) Secretly, he sent a messenger to find out about Cuifu Nunnery and learned that the abbess had left, that the two nuns had returned home to secular life, and that the nunnery was uninhabited, though still under padlock. After he relayed this information to Jingguan, she felt that a load had been taken off her mind.

After completing his business, Wenren wanted to return to Huzhou. So he consulted his aunt, saying, “Jingguan’s hair is not yet long enough for a wedding. She can continue to stay with you while I go take the national-level exams before we move on to our next course of action.”

Jingguan said to him, “You mustn’t let even my mother know the truth, because sending me to a nunnery was her idea. She’ll wonder why I suddenly returned to secular life. Wait until my hair has grown long enough. If you and I go to her together, there will be nothing she can do.”

“These are words of wisdom,” said Wenren.

After he took leave of Jingguan, he returned home in glory. When he greeted his mother, he said nothing about Jingguan. At the end of the tenth month, when he was about to take the national-level exams, he went to see his aunt. By this time, Jingguan’s hair had reached her shoulders and was long enough for her to wear a bun piece. Wenren offered to take her along on his journey, but his aunt objected, saying, “As I see it, this girl of a gentle nature is quite a good match for you. Since she’ll be your lawfully wedded wife, how can you take her here and there before she has acquired proper status? This will be unseemly! (MC: Very sensible.) Leave her here with me. When you succeed on the exams and come back in triumph, her hair will be long enough. At that time, I’ll declare her to be my adopted daughter. Won’t it be nice to hold a proper wedding ceremony?”

After being treated to this sermon, Wenren saw no alternative but to stifle his feelings and say good-bye to Jingguan.

He went to the capital to sit for the exams, and, sure enough, he passed. Having won second-class honors, he was appointed a trainee in the Ministry of Rites. In the registry book of all the successful candidates of that year, he had the words “betrothed to Yang-shi” included in the entry under his name before he applied for permission to go on leave for his wedding ceremony. (MC: Nothing under the sun can bring greater joy than this.) By imperial decree, his wedding ceremony was to be complete with red bunting, artificial flowers, presents, and a banquet. After he returned home posthaste, greeted his mother, and told her about his wedding, his mother said, “You’ve never been betrothed. Whom are you marrying?”

“Let me tell you, Mother: When I was in Hangzhou, my aunt betrothed me to her adopted daughter.”

“Why haven’t I been informed?”

“You’ll get to know her soon enough, Mother.”

On a chosen auspicious day, a wedding procession went on a festooned boat to the Huang residence in Hangzhou, complete with red bunting, artificial flowers, and drummers. After Wenren bowed to his aunt and announced that he was there for the wedding ceremony, as directed by the imperial court, his aunt was beside herself with joy. “So I had the right idea after all! And now, look at all this splendor!” First she greeted Jingguan, and, holding hands, the two of them filled each other in on what had happened since they had last seen each other. By this time, Jingguan was attired in lay clothes. Mrs. Huang having shown her many kindnesses, she acknowledged her as her adoptive mother. Mrs. Huang personally dressed her up as a bride and saw her onto the festooned sedan-chair and then the boat. As the auspicious date rolled around while they were en route, they lit the nuptial candles right there on the boat. Truly,

Under the red gauze bed curtains

Sat the bride and the bridegroom.

Under the brocade quilt

Was revealed what both already knew.

On reaching Wenren’s home, both groom and bride bowed to his mother. The bride’s beauty pleased the old lady. Noticing Jingguan’s Huzhou accent, she asked, “Since you just came from Hangzhou, why do you have our local accent?” Whereupon Wenren gave her a complete account of how Mrs. Yang had made a mistake by sending her daughter to a nunnery and other details, from beginning to end. Only then did his mother understand the situation.

The next day, Wenren and Jingguan went together to her home. As Wenren presented Mrs. Yang and Jingguan’s brother with his name cards, referring to himself as “son-in-law” and “brother-in-law” respectively, Mrs. Yang thought he was quite mistaken and refused to take the cards. Jingguan felt obliged to walk over. As she called out, “Mother!” Mrs. Yang gave a start at the sight of a young lady in a bridal headdress and gown. She rose hurriedly to her feet but for the moment failed to realize that the bride was her very own daughter.

“Don’t be alarmed,” said the daughter. “I’m your daughter, Jingguan of Cuifu Nunnery.”

Her mother did recognize her voice, and closer examination of her face convinced the mother of her identity. But with her long hair and her decidedly uncommon attire, a cursory look would not have sufficed to tell who she was. “I haven’t seen you for more than a year,” said her mother. “And you never sent word. When I heard that the abbess had taken you elsewhere, I was worried sick. Earlier this year, I again sent a servant to make inquiries, but he didn’t see even the ghost of a shadow in the nunnery. I miss you so much, but I had no idea what to do. Now tell me, how did you get where you are today?”

After her daughter told her everything, from her chance meeting with Wenren on a boat the year before to her wedding by imperial decree, Mrs. Yang jumped up and down in the exuberance of her joy. Smiling broadly, she told her son to bring his brother-in-law inside. The son, who was school-educated and aware of proper etiquette, hastened to do her bidding and courteously escorted Wenren into Mrs. Yang’s presence to stand next to his sister. When accepting the young couple’s bows, Mrs. Yang felt as if she were in a dream. She said, “If I’d known earlier that this was in store for you, I wouldn’t have bothered to send you to a nunnery!”

The daughter countered, “But if you hadn’t done so, I wouldn’t be here today in these circumstances.”

Right away, they escorted Mrs. Yang to the Wenren family residence to complete the ceremony. The wedding banquet was held amid great fanfare, complete with a band of musicians. The party continued late into the night.

However, Mr. Wenren’s career was by no means smooth sailing. With one setback after another, he did not win the gilded waistband that denoted high rank until he was fifty years old. Yang-shi received a ladyship, and they lived a quiet life to a ripe old age. Once, on meeting an accomplished fortune-teller, Wenren asked why his official career had not gone the way he wanted, and the fortune-teller said, “That’s because your youthful indiscretions hurt your credit record in the netherworld.” Deeply remorseful about his youthful escapades at Cuifu Nunnery, Wenren often used his lesson to warn people against nunneries. Isn’t this a case of “adulterers becoming lawfully wedded couples”? But if there hadn’t been a predestined bond between them, how would his wonderful marriage have come about? There is a poem in testimony:

No marriage is not made in Heaven;

How lamentable that humans turn a deaf ear!

If marriages are left to human connivance,

What credit can go to divine intervention?